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Memelord (5e Joke Class)
The Memelord "I Roll to pickpocket anubis!" ''-Many, many people.'' A Miner walks out of a mine, where bandits are lying in ambush, immediately, the miner smacks all of the bandits with his pickaxe, and kicks their shins, killing them. A thief calls upon anubis and rolls a d20 against anubis's, he rolls a 20, anubis rolls an 18, Anubis glares as the thief takes out a ring of infinite wishes from anubis's pocket. Memelords are guys who do stupid things because they can. Creating a Memelord Why? Quick Build You can make a Memelord quickly by following these suggestions. First, don't. Class Features As a Memelord you gain the following class features. ; Hit Points Hit Dice: 2d6 per Memelord level Hit Points at 1st Level: 12 + Constitution modifier Hit Points at Higher Levels: 2d6 + Constitution modifier per Memelord level after 1st ; Proficiencies Armor: Everything Weapons: Everything Tools: Everything. Saving Throws: Strength, Dexterity, Constitution, Intelligence, Charisma Skills: Choose 5 skills, and get proficiency in them. ; Equipment You start with any equipment any other class starts with, as anybody can be a memelord. Your starting gold equals 42d1x10. Table: The Memelord Foot Kick Your meme power is too sucky to actually do anything at 1st level, so instead, you must kick enemies. As an action, you may attack using your foot. Your foot deals 1d8 bludgeoning damage, and is counted as having the finesse and light properties. Unnatural Resilience Beginning at 2nd level, you begin to show a little bit of the powers of memes. When you are reduced to 0 hitpoints or lower, you may make a DC 5 constitution saving throw, on a success, you immediately have your HP set to 1 hitpoint, refusing to die. Memetic Archetype Starting at 3rd level, your japery has now allowed you to decide how you are going to piss off the GM and potentially everyone else in the game. Choose from the Digger Rogue and Anubis Thief archetypes, listed below. your archetype gives you special features at lvl 3, 7, 10, 17, and 20. Ability Score Increase When you reach 4th level, and again at 8th, 10, 12th, 14th, 16th and 19th level, you can increase one ability score of your choice by 2, or you can increase two ability scores of your choice by 1. Unlike normal, you can increase an ability score above 20 using this feature. Extra Attack Beginning at 5th level, you can attack twice, instead of once, whenever you take the Attack action on your turn. The number of attacks increases to three when you reach 11th level in this class. LVL 5 DEATH Starting at 6th level, you gain the power not only over memes, but over bullshit as well. You can, as an action, pick a target within 420 ft of you, if that target's level is a multiple of 5, they die instantly. Arguement At 9th level, you can use your reaction to crush the hopes and dreams of any opponents who wish to rise against you. As a reaction to getting hit, you can immediately call out on the target's bullshit, making them take 1d10 psychic damage. You may continue arguing with the target for up to 1 minute, making them take a bonus 1d10 psychic damage for each 10 seconds you argue with the target. Wise Blade At lvl 13, you add your wisdom modifier to all attack rolls, damage rolls, skill checks, death saving throws, normal saving throws, magic attacks, not-magic attacks, attempts to pickpocket anubis, armor class, and rolls to move. Wiseness Beginning at 15th level, you gain proficiency in Wisdom saving throws. Stale Memes At 18th level, your Memes have grown old to the party (most likely), and you draw power on their ever-increasing annoyance. Whenever a party member, in real life or in the game, complains, or otherwise says some negative remark about either you or your character, you gain 1 point of Stale memery, up to a cap of 420. As a reaction to an action being taken by another creature, you may throw a stale meme at them, making them groan or sigh, canceling and wasting their action. Student of Talent Memelord are all exceptional students of the act of debauchery, and all have their own style of it. Digger Rogue Digger Rogue memelords are complete assholes, seeking to be as cancerous to the game as possible, your job as a Digger rogue memelord is to piss off everyone else until they all want to collectively strangle you and your character. Challenge When you become this jerkwad, at 3rd level, you gain the ability to do absolutely craptons of damage. As a bonus action, you may yell out something absolutely irritating to an enemy, forcing them to make a wisdom saving throw. ( 8+ charisma modifier+ proficiency bonus) If they fail, you will deal 10d10 damage to them on your next attack. If you shout out "DEEZ NUTS" or "DAMN DANIEL", the enemy will automatically critically fail their saving throw. Dig Starting at 7th level, you gain the ability to not ever be hit, ever. As a bonus action, you may treat your movement speed as burrowing speed until the start of your next turn. Dab Beginning at 10th level, you have become so horrible, so inhuman, that you may use your action to Dab at an enemy within 420 ft. They must make a strength, dexterity, constitution, intelligence, wisdom, and charisma saving throw all in that order, ( 8+ charisma modifier+ proficiency bonus) if they fail at any of them, they take 10d10 psychic damage and 5d10 poison damage. If they fail at all of the saves, they instead take 20d10 psychic damage, and 10d10 poison damage. War Pick Mastery At 17th level, your ability with weird and frankly useless weapons has increased dramatically, the War Pick's damage die for you is 5d8. Supreme Subterranean Starting at 20th level, when you are burrowed underground from burrowing speed, you may still attack targets within a range of 420 ft. Anubis Thief The Digger Rogue's far less cancerous brethren, Anubis Thieves are usually more lighthearted and less about screwing people up and being annoying. Pickpocket When you become this guy, at 3rd level, your amazing handsiness skills allow you to pickpocket people as a free action. Chillllll. Additionally, at 3rd level, your lightheartedness lets you defuse situations easily, you can cast calm emotions like a cantrip. Roast Starting at 7th level, you can Roast a target within 420 ft as an action. you pick a target, and say something demeaning, degrading, or outright mean to them. The GM Decides the quality of the roast, deciding it's effect and damage die. However, the damage type is always fire. Fedora Tip Beginning at 10th level, you may create a fedora, and then tip it at all enemies in a 420ft cone in front of you. all enemies that could potentially be attracted to you romantically must make a wisdom saving throw, (8+ charisma modifier+ proficiency bonus) if they fail, then they are charmed by you until the end of time. Gay Baby Jail Starting at 17th level, you can, as a reaction to taking damage, force your opponent to go to gay baby jail. they must make a constitution saving throw or be put into gay baby jail for 1 minute, being unable to take any actions. If an Avian-like creature is put into Gay baby jail, they are instead imprisoned for 1 hour. I Roll to Pickpocket Anubis At 20th level, you can attempt to do the riskiest action possible. using your action, bonus action, reaction, and interaction, you may roll to pickpocket anubis. Anubis appears and rolls his own dice against yours. whoever's die rolls higher gets to pickpocket the other. If Anubis wins, he steals your clothes, items, and all of your gold. If you win however, you may steal one thing out of Anubis's pockets. Note: Your DM may at any time cancel this by sharply yelling out, in as squeaky a voice possible, NO. Category:Totally Serious Things